god & i

Lent has begun for us Christians and around the world people are preparing for Easter Sunday. Growing up Greek Orthodox our Lent involves a strict diet - we basically become vegan, and some people cut out all oils too. During this period we reflect on our lives, try to elevate ourselves spiritually and come closer to God.

As a child, I wouldn’t say I wasn’t religious but it was all that I knew. It was part of my DNA and daily life. On Sundays, right after Holy Communion, I would attend Church School up until the end of the service. Thank dad for making me extra nerdy by providing me with a big briefcase to hold all my papers in from the lessons! Church and God were part of my upbringing. Not in an overpowering and strict sense but I was taught to see God everywhere. He’s not merely up in the sky and invisible but he’s everywhere.

During my teenage years I still had faith but I was angry with God. I became depressed and began to self-doubt myself and god. I began to question why? Why me? Why won’t God help me? I specifically made an effort to excel in my religious classes in school and took it a step further during my A-Levels by studying Philosophy & Religion. I wanted - needed - answers because in my personal life I was falling apart. 

"When I was craving and needing Him the most, I felt neglected."

During the worst of it, I hardly attended classes and I remember one day I was so upset that I travelled to West London - bearing in mind I was from North London - to my Greek School’s Church for comfort and to have a chat with the parish priest. He wasn’t at the Church and in my mind I saw this as God failing me. When I was craving and needing Him the most, I felt neglected.

This sentiment continued for a number of years and I had an up and down relationship with God. It would get better whenever I travelled to Cyprus or Greece and visited Churches and Monasteries; I felt God alive. But then I’d return home and it would all disappear again. 

"Spiritually I’ve always been scattered but I guess that’s the journey to enlightenment"

I have to be honest, it’s only in the last couple years that I’ve started to find God again and as each day goes by I find my love for Him getting stronger. Also, when you’re young there’s a sense of shame about being openly religious. It’s not cool. But as I’ve entered my thirties and with the multitude of media platforms that are out there, I’m observing more proud Orthodox Christians, and I love to see a lot of them are young and unafraid of being religious - unlike me.

Lent always makes me think of my past and how spiritually I’ve always been scattered but I guess that’s the journey to enlightenment. Without 'doubt', we won’t learn how to educate ourselves. It’s all part of the journey and instead of stressing out that I don’t have the answers right now, I’m actually excited to learn over time. 

Rhéa x

This week I made some mushroom pies, which I served with salad, from a Cypriot cookbook. I’ve been wanting to learn Cypriot recipes as I’ve never really cooked any, simply ate them! This recipe does have oil, as I mentioned at the beginning of this blog, some people don’t use oil during lent. But, I wanted to share something for those that are looking to start fasting for the first time, or still new to it and are not ready to be completely strict with the diet. The recipe is from the cookbook Traditional Recipes of Cyprus by Athos Christodoulou.

Note: make sure your pastry is thin when you roll it out, mine were too thick. I also didn't finish them so I've frozen the remainder and will just warm them up in the oven as and when.

If you're interested in buying the book, click here for the Amazon link.